Sometimes I wonder if I really know what I am doing when it comes raising Kamva. I have people helping me along the way but do I as her mother really know what I am doing?
I know one thing I battle with is discipline and I was reading one of my favourite blogs last night, epic parent, and it was about Bad Parenting. The thing that stood out for me in the four parenting mistakes parents make was the one about being a whimp:
The wimpy parent shies away from asserting her values, opinions, rules and let’s the child run the household. Wimpy parents typically believe that punishing, scolding or setting boundaries harms their kids self esteem. They also believe they are called to “work deals” and compromise and the more “gifts” a parent gives…the better the parent. Wimpy parents are also the people that have come up with the “let’s not keep score” and “everyone deserves a trophy” mentality. Can I just say that mentality makes me sick!!! Parents, it’s time to grow a set, set firm boundaries, discipline your children and teach them that second place is the first looser! (just kidding about the last one…stole that one from Ricky Bobby)
I shy away from disciplining yes I shout at times and a smack here and there but that’s about it, I have not even tried the naughty corner like I said I would. I don’t know why I can’t discpline, maybe because I am generally soft person but I wonder if I am not ruining my poor child?
I also fall under the ‘Its all about me catergory’
Because It’s All About ME: As I reflect back on my parenting journey, I must confess that many of my decisions are based on what is convenient for ME. I will play lego’s, when it is convenient for ME. I will go snowboarding, when it’s convenient for ME. I will have devotionals, when it is convenient for ME. I say “NO” more than “YES”, because “NO” is more convenient for ME. And where in Scripture does is say that life is all about ME!!?!
This I think will be a difficult one to ‘over come’ as much Kamva talk and talks, we still have some frustrations where she can’t verbalise what she wants or what she wants me to do and I don’t always do what she wants like draw ‘fowfers(flowers)’ or play ball with her when she wants. So from now I am going to try this, when she brings a ball to play with I will stop what I am doing and play with her, I know it won’t be easy in the beginning but think eventually it will become something I get used to.
Two years later and I am still trying to get the hang of this parenting thing and willing to try aything to get at least some of it right. This is me trying to be a better parent to my Miss K.
P.S To read the rest of the blog go here
Lots of love
